Still out here, alive but not kicking

I am back. I have a cold that turned into a cough and made it really hard to post. This year I have been feeling power of my disease as it takes away everything I've tried to keep. A few months ago I can still move my right hand and use the recline control to lean back and rest and cough up phlegm. I'm no longer able to move my right hand And All it does is just lays there. Earlier this week I realized I'm having more trouble holding my hand up and need to have my chair recline back before my wife leaves. This makes it difficult to read my PC unless it is positioned perfectly. Besides having MS having a hearing problem and I find it difficult to find the right spot in my glasses to focus. The burdens of these have made me feel ground down like never before.
I realized a long time ago is MS is a life sentence. Normally there is one way out and that is death. MS does not do that so who knows how long I have to deal with this as well as my caregivers. And I'm really down in the dumps I talked about wishing I was and all my family encourages me that they don't want that to happen.
I know the Lord Jesus as my personal Savior so I have 2 other ways to get out of this disease. One is a miraculous event by God to heal me. Personally I don't think this is a realistic possibility but you never know. There is also the return Jesus to look forward to. I actually fear that because if it happens there are people I love will be left behind because they don't trust the Lord in a personal way. God is long-suffering toward us so I don't know how many years before that happens. Many people see the events in the Middle East and say that is close but I think it could get out much worse.
So in summation there are 3 ways out for me and not of them I expect to happen. I trust my caregivers and they are so encouraging and almost make me weep for gratitude. My lowest time are in the evening and my wife always makes me laugh. The 2 new cats pretty entertaining and have yet to be affectionate but we think I will come. Later post I hope to update you on the cats. Between Atlas and them I have distractions from my condition that help me with the day.