Meditation of late

I was thinking the other day that Jesus healed many people. It is rarely mentioned but at the pool Bethesda were many who were not healed there as well as in Jerusalem and Samaria. There may have been people of faith. Sometimes I wonder why Jesus does not heal me. But I think of all the people at the pool waiting for the water to be troubled by an angel and they would step in and be healed. When I consider these people I realize there are many Jesus left in their same condition. This helped me accept my disease more. The Lord knows how much I want to come home and how much I want to stay with my wife. We have such a special bond. She always makes me laugh and I enjoy her deadpan type of humor. When I go home that will be gone because is only for this life. I so weary of my disease and the burden placed on her but I trust her to take care of me like no one else. I also Appreciate my son Matt a lot as well as Tom and Dan when they are home. I need to build more that daily trust in my Savior.