Yesterday's post was from "sad Phil". Today I will post a more realistic view of things. As you know I have an incurable untreatable disease that progresses and is moving faster than normal. Realistically looking at the situation there are three ways for me to act in this body has become something of a prison.
One would be that I am miraculously healed. This could manifest itself in many different levels from complete restoration of my health to getting my right hand use back. Have little hope that the Lord will heal me in one of these levels. The Lord can see my heart and he knows that were I get my health back I would be faced with the same tendencies of temptation that this disease has as physically freed me from. I also think that if he were going to it would've been party passed by now. It is still a possibility but I do not think you will happen.
As I can way would be the Lord return for his own of which I am using my faith in the work of the Lord Jesus my God and Shepherd on the cross at Calvary. He took the punishment for my sin upon himself so that I would be free of the penalty. There will come a day that all believers will be taken up to be with the Lord forever. I've come to believe that this will not happen in my lifetime. For a number of reasons why and one is that I believe things will get much worse in general on earth in society as well as earthly problems. In Peter he says "he is long-suffering, not willing get any should perish but all come to repentance". He lingered over Israel many centuries giving them plenty of opportunities to turn back to the Lord. I do not discount this as a possibility because it the Bible also says that "now is the accepted time, now is the day of salvation". If you have not done so please dear one come to Lord while there is still time.
The third way is that this body passes into death and I will be with the Lord. I believe this is my most realistic hope to get beyond this disease. This can play out a number of ways a number which I fear and number of which I would view as a mercy. I read a biography of the great John Wesley and after a lifetime of serving the Lord, preaching the gospel, he climbed up to bed in the second story and the next morning he was found deceased with the most contented look on his face. Believe Lord rewarded him with a painless passing. Cannot say I served the Lord as of of many of the great saints who have passed before me but it would be a mercy to pass in my sleep with no traumatic events. I believe would be the easiest on my loved ones also. I dream of this book do not feel I deserve it. Lord could provide a number of ways in which I passed with the least trauma to my family. I pray for this. Last extreme is the long drawnout painful death which challenges all of us to honor my DNR. My heart is very to go but my body is still here. I fear the breaking bonds which I have of my loved ones but look forward to being with my Lord. I believe my loved ones feel similarly. There's such a wide range of possible medical situations is truly impossible to cover them all so that everyone feels confident there following my wishes. God bless my family and I hope they see my passing as a release from the difficulties and just keep seeming to mount. So I think this may end my very serious Phil posts. Can't say for certain because I forget from day to day what I've already posted. Again God bless you dear reader and thank you.
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